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Super Cool Artistic work Must see the link - Muhammad Amir - 06-24-2007 <font color="maroon"><b>Pretty awesome Images Super Cool Artistic work</b></font id="maroon"> http//www.frogview.com/show.php?file=1190 <b><font color="maroon">Please put your speaker ON and click this link .......... it's really nice !! Smile with little boy </b></font id="maroon"> http//www.coffeecup.com/smile/ <b><font color="maroon">AMMAZING PICTURE</font id="maroon"></b> http//img415.imageshack.us/img415/8938/faceisland6rj.jpg <font color="maroon"><b>FBI EYES</b></font id="maroon"> http//users.chartertn.net/tonytemplin/FBI_eyes/ <b><font color="maroon">Most Hated BodyBuilder in the World</font id="maroon"></b> http//www.greggvalentino.net/ - Muhammad Amir - 06-24-2007 Work Related Cartoons see below links http//upload4.postimage.org/1670086/photo_hosting.html http//upload4.postimage.org/1670090/photo_hosting.html - Muhammad Amir - 06-24-2007 <b>George Bush goes to a primary school to talk about the war. After his talk he offers question time. One little boy puts up his hand and George asks him what his name is. "Bob". "And what is your question, Bob?" "I have 3 questions. First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN? Second, why are you President when Al Gore got more votes? And third, what happened to Osama Bin Laden? Just then the bell rings for recess. George Bush informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess. When they resume George says, "OK, where were we? Oh that's right --- question time. Who has a question?" A different little boy puts up his hand . George points him out and asks him what his name is. "Steve" "And what is your question, Steve?" "I have 5 questions. First, why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN? Second, why are you President when Al Gore got more votes? Third, what happened to Osama Bin Laden? Fourth, why did the recess bell go 20 minutes early? And fifth, where is "Bob?"</b> - Muhammad Amir - 06-24-2007 <b>A young businessman had just started his own firm. He rented a beautiful office and had it furnished with antiques. Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear the hot shot, the businessman picked up the phone and started to pretend he had a big deal working. He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments. Finally he hung up and asked the visitor, "Can I help you?" The man said, "Yeah, I've come to activate your phone lines." </b> - Muhammad Amir - 06-24-2007 <b>The population of this country is 237 million. 104 million are retired. That leaves 133 million to do the work. There are 85 million in school, which leave 48 million to do the work. Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government. This leaves 19 million to do the work. 4 million are in the Armed Forces, which leaves 15 million to do the work. Take from the total the 14.8 million people who work for State and City Government and that leaves 200,000 to do the work. There are 188,000 in hospitals, so that leaves 12,000 to do the work. Now, there are 11,998 people in Prisons. That leaves Just two people to do the work. You and me. And you're just sitting there reading jokes all day!</b> - Muhammad Amir - 06-24-2007 <b>Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht frist and lsat ltteer is at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatle mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae we do not raed ervey lteter by it slef but wrod as a wlohe.</b> - Muhammad Amir - 06-24-2007 <b>In a New York park, a young boy was attacked by a savage dog. passer by happened to see that and came to the rescue. Having tackled the dog, he strangled it to death. A reporter for the New York Times was watching all this and took snap shots for a front page picture in the next days paper. Approaching our hero he says "Your heroic feat shall be published with the headline - Brave New Yorker rescues boy". "I'm not from New York" replied our brave hero. "Oh in that case we'll change the headline - Brave American rescues boy from savage dog." "I'm not American either" replied our brave hero. On being asked about who he really is our hero replied, "I'm Pakistani." Well the next day the headline on the front page of The New York Times said "Muslim Fundamentalist strangles puppy dog to death in New York park. FBI investigating possible link to al-Qaeda."</b> - Muhammad Amir - 06-24-2007 <b> <font color="maroon">ALL I CAN DO FOR YA DAD!!</font id="maroon"> An old man lived alone in Palestine. He wanted to dig his potato garden, but it was very hard work. His only son, who would have helped him, was in an Israeli prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and mentioned his predicament. Shortly, he received this reply, "For HEAVEN'S SAKE, Dad, don't dig up that garden, that's where I buried the GUNS!" At 4 A.M. the next morning, a dozen of Israeli soldiers showed up and dug up the entire garden, without finding any guns. Confused, the old man wrote another note to his son telling him what happened, and asking him what to do next. His son's reply was "Now plant your potatoes, Dad. This is the best I can do for you at this time."</b> - Muhammad Amir - 06-24-2007 <b><font color="maroon">How to catch a lion.....?? </font id="maroon"> Newton's Method Let, the lion catch you. For every action there is equal and opposite reaction. Implies you caught lion Einstein Method Run in the direction opposite to that of the lion.Due to higher relative velocity, the lion will also run faster and will get tired soon. Now you can trap it easily. Software Engineer Method Catch a cat and claim that your testing has proven that its a Lion. If anyone comes back with issues tell that you will upgrade it to Lion. Pakistani Police Method catch any animal and interrogate it to accept that its a Lion. Now lets kill the lion... Michael Jackson method Continuously dance before the lion for 5 or 6 days. George bush method Link the lion with osama bin laden and shoot him!!! Younis Khan method Ask the lion to bowl at u. U bat for 200 balls and score 1 run</b> - Muhammad Amir - 06-24-2007 <font color="maroon"><b>Laloo's Application to Microsoft</font id="maroon"></b> Laloo Prasad sent his Resume - to apply for the post of Software Engineer in Microsoft Corporation, To My Deer BilVa >From Hum Bihar se Lalwa bolot hain Here with I apply to yor compony for the post of Softwar Enginer. I not have any B.E/MCA degree, but I am very talent. I know yu keep only talent pepool, so I apply. I had made so mani windos on by bungala in Patna...that to in goment fund. So I can devlop more Windos in yor compony in yor goment fund. I know you make MS-Office, I had made so many office in Bihar. I can make so many office in yor company also. I request yo take me please. Yours censorly Mr. Lallu Parsad ------------------------------------------------------------------------ ---- A few days later he got this reply ------------------------------------------------------------------------ ---- Dear Mr. Laloo Prasad, You do not meet our requirements. Please do not send any further correspondence. No phone call shall be entertained. Thanks Bill Gates. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ ---- Laloo prasad jumped with joy on receiving this reply. He arranged a press conference "Bhaiyon aur Behno, aap ko jaan kar khushi hogee ki hum ko Amereeca mein naukri mil gayee hai." Everyone was delighted. Laloo prasad continued...... "Ab hum aap sab ko apnaa appointment Letter padkar sunaongaa ? par letter angreeze main hai - isliyen saath-saath Hindi main translate bhee karoonga. Dear Mr. Laloo Prasad ----- Pyare Laloo prasad bhaiyya You do not meet ----- aap to miltay hee naheen ho our requirement ----- humko to zaroorat hai Please do not send any furthur correspondance ----- ab Letter vetter bhejne ka kaouno zaroorat nahee. No phone call ----- phoonwa ka bhee zaroorat nahee hai shall be entertained ----- bahut khaatir kee jayegi. Thanks ----- aapkaa bahut bahut dhanyavad. Bill Gates. ---- Bilva - Muhammad Amir - 06-24-2007 <b><font color="maroon">PrOfessOr KhAn's EnGlISh</b></font id="maroon"> Prof. Khan doesn't know English well. See how and what he speaks. INSIDE THE CLASSOpen the door of the window. Let the atmosphere come in. Open the doors of the window.Let the airforce come in. Cut an apple into two halves -- take the bigger half. Shhh... Quiet,boys ... the principal just passed away in the corridor. You, meet me behind the class. Both of you three, get out of the class. Close the doors of the windows please... I have winter in my nose today... Take copper wire of any metal especially of Silver... Take 5cm wire of any length. ABOUT HIS FAMILY I have two daughters. Both of them are girls...(?) My long sister was boiling in water so i send her to hospital. AT THE GROUND All of you, stand in a straight circle. There is no wind in the balloon... TO A BOY, ANGIRLYI talk, he talk, why you middle middle talk? GIVING A PUNISHMENT You, rotate the ground four times... You, go and under stand the tree... You three of you, stand together separately. Why are you late -- say YES or NO ....(?) SIR AT HIS BEST Sir had once gone to a film with his wife. By chance, he happened to see one of his students at the theater, though the boy didn't see him. So the next day at the school... (to that boy) -----> "Yesterday I saw you WITH MY WIFE at the Cinema theater". - Muhammad Amir - 06-24-2007 <b><font color="maroon">Conversation Between George And Condi, Hilarious! </b></font id="maroon"> George is a boss and Condi the Secretary George Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening? Condi Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China. George Great. Lay it on me. Condi Hu is the new leader of China . George That's what I want to know. Condi That's what I'm telling you. George That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China? Condi Yes. George I mean the fellow's name. Condi Hu. George The guy in China . Condi Hu. George The new leader of China . Condi Hu. George The main man in China! Condi Hu is leading China. George Now whaddya' asking me for? Condi I'm telling you, Hu is leading China . George Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China ? Condi That's the man's name. George That's who's name? Condi Yes. George Will you, or will you not, tell me the name of the new leader of China ? Condi Yes, sir. George Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China ? I thought he's dead in the Middle Eas t. Condi That's correct. George Then who is in China? Condi Yes, sir. George Yassir is in China ? Condi No, sir. George Then who is? Condi Yes, sir. George Yassir? Condi No, sir. George Look Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China . Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone. Condi Kofi? George No, thanks. Condi You want Kofi? George No. Condi You don't want Kofi. George No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N. Cond i Yes, sir. George Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N. Condi Kofi? George Milk! Will you please make the call? Condi And call who? George Who is the guy at the U.N? Condi Hu is the guy in China. George Will you stay out of China?! Condi Yes, sir. George And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N. Condi Kofi. George All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone. - Muhammad Amir - 06-24-2007 <b><font color="maroon">You are accountant (supposed to be very wise) ... Okay let's have some test if you will pass it ,Its certain that you may become BILLIONAIRE Passing marks are only 75 I got only 44 [xx(] </font id="maroon"></b> Test is here http//www.forbes.com/static_html/bill/2004/quiz/bill04quizFla.shtml |