ARE YOU IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE?

Cool Lioness · 07-15-2007, 05:49 PM

Are you in love with some one? If yes would you like to share something with us about Him/Her? Like

Who is He/She? How did you first find that you were in love? What is the habit or anything you like the most in her/him?

Well as far as i am concerned or my love story is concerned, in very short words, sometimes back i was interested to hell (with all my heart and soul) in someone. But that was thru internet which ended up as a drama or play plotted by someone (quite aged and already married with kids) for fun or God knows for what reasons, so i had to break up.
Yes you can have a good laugh on my foolishness now as i do too sometimes when i am in good mood. Otherwise most of the time, i only feel anger, pain and sorry for the time i wasted with him and my pure feelings i felt for a person who did not deserve them. But still thanks to God i caught the reality in time.

Anyway enough of my s*ob stroy, your trun now.

kamranACA · 07-17-2007, 07:24 PM

Dear Coollioness,

This internet story is very much common since the web surfing and chatting has become very popular and most interesting affair for the youth, both males and females.

You are strong and courgeous enough to share your story on the forum. Was there any purpose behind such sharing? I feel you just wished to warn the youth about the damages which internet can bring to one's life.

You appear to be from UAE. The girl to whom I loved is also at UAE. I also met her on net and then we even had face to face meetings. The most loving characteristic of her personality was that she belonged to a very settled, known and rich family but her style, habits and attitude was full of modesty and sympathies for every one and she never was even felt to be proudy of her position. This was her best feature. Things eventually went up wrong the way due to the already taken decisions by her family (not known to her) and this ultimately ended up the story.

I still have all the respect for her and being a very realistic person I never gave her any wrong advice. Might be any thing odd was not a part of my life's books and I always strived for the validity of all the acts.

Hoping best for you in future.

Best regards,

Kamran.

Cool Lioness · 07-17-2007, 08:11 PM

<blockquote id="quote">quote<hr height="1" noshade id="quote">Originally posted by kamranACA
 Dear Coollioness,

This internet story is very much common since the web surfing and chatting has become very popular and most interesting affair for the youth, both males and females.

You are strong and courgeous enough to share your story on the forum. Was there any purpose behind such sharing? I feel you just wished to warn the youth about the damages which internet can bring to one's life.

You appear to be from UAE. The girl to whom I loved is also at UAE. I also met her on net and then we even had face to face meetings. The most loving characteristic of her personality was that she belonged to a very settled, known and rich family but her style, habits and attitude was full of modesty and sympathies for every one and she never was even felt to be proudy of her position. This was her best feature. Things eventually went up wrong the way due to the already taken decisions by her family (not known to her) and this ultimately ended up the story.

I still have all the respect for her and being a very realistic person I never gave her any wrong advice. Might be any thing odd was not a part of my life's books and I always strived for the validity of all the acts.

Hoping best for you in future.

Best regards,

Kamran.
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Yes i know that these internet stories are very common. But i never thought that i could be ever trapped by someone in this way. May be i have learnt a lesson now that never ever have a blind trust on any one. I know people who have very clean heart (saaf neeyats) easily trust on others. Because they think that all are like them, which in reality is an impossible thing. Sab aik jaise thouri hotay hain. The guy whom i was talking to was actually a person, who was sort of our family friend. Whom i considered as one of my very good friend, i had trust on him, i would share alot with him, i had respected him, but i dont know what went wrong.

I do have courage to share my whole story but i wont do it. Because the guy had opologised enough, and i know he was ashamed of his deed. I just dont want to discuss it any more and make him guilty again and again. I know this lesson is enough for him for his life time and he is never gonna repeat it again.

Yes the purpose behind this topic is that inside i am totally broken but i cannot show it to any one around me. I thought i will be able to say something here but i am a failure again. Secondly you have guesed rightly that in this way i want to warn every one here that please do not believe on relationship based on internet. 99 out of 100 are fake and just for time pass.

Thanks for sharing your story with us. otherwise i was thinking no one is going to put anything under this topic. Forum bhi tou Accounts waalon ka hai. Jo ke famous hain apni dry nature kee wajah se [)]

You said in a post that you tried to have a doctor wife. If you say i can help you. I know alot of really good doctor girls. Ab aap kaho yahan baith kar shadi bureau khol loo..... LOL

kamranACA · 07-17-2007, 08:54 PM

Dear,

Sometimes misconceptions and misunderstandings lead the disasters. Sometimes our self admiration dont makes the things workable. And of course, so much is not in our fates which we percieve to be a part of our lives.

May God bless you and give you a best future.

Regards,

Cool Lioness · 07-17-2007, 11:19 PM

<blockquote id="quote">quote<hr height="1" noshade id="quote">Originally posted by kamranACA
 Dear,

Sometimes misconceptions and misunderstandings lead the disasters. Sometimes our self admiration dont makes the things workable. And of course, so much is not in our fates which we percieve to be a part of our lives.

May God bless you and give you a best future.

Regards,
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Yes disasters. The biggest disaster that i am facing is that i have lost myself. My personality is badly effected. I cannot trust anyone any more. Everyone seems to me as a Liar. Every word is fake. Every emotion is fraud. No one cares about you whatever good you do with him/her. Every one looks at you with an hunter's eyes. He will hunt you as soon as find you alone or weak. I am afraid of everyone now. My trust on human specially on MAN is shattered into pieces [(]
and i am afraid that as aftermath it can effect my matrimonial life in future.

Thanks for the wishes. Same i would wish you.

Astute Accountant · 07-18-2007, 12:47 AM

Thanks to the cyber stories which abstained me from indulging in friendship at net. I'm a relexed one. Thank GOD!!!!!!!!!!!

Cool Lioness · 07-18-2007, 01:56 PM

<blockquote id="quote">quote<hr height="1" noshade id="quote">Originally posted by Astute Accountant
 Thanks to the cyber stories which abstained me from indulging in friendship at net. I'm a relexed one. Thank GOD!!!!!!!!!!!
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Well thats really good. But doest it mean that you dont have any Special friend out side the net too?

kamranACA · 07-18-2007, 04:46 PM

Dears,

Once I read the phliosphy of some unknown SAINT; he never accepted any one as his follower (MUREED) without asking him a question. Have you ever been in love? Whenever the reply was in No; the person was not taken into BAIT. The philosphy behind was, the saint was of the view that whoever does not have an experience of love and specially of its failure in this materialistic world, cannot understand the basic requirements of being in REAL LOVE with God.

The deprived feelings, broken hearts, tears in eyes, soft emotions and distrust on materialistic attractions is the come out of real love, if any one had ever been in its exposure. These things help out a person to get into the love of ultimate lover (God).

Of course some of the Saints did not like it at all but even they had been in love in some part of their lives. Hazrat Ali Hajveri (known as Daataa Ganj Bakhsh) Rehmutullah Aleh has written in his book "KASHF-UL-MAHJOOB" that he had been in love with some beautiful girl for one year in his life time and he declared this one year's period as the worst period of his life becoz such materialistic love abstained him to some extent from YAAD-E-ELLAHI.

In my view the real love is the love with ALLAH.

However, what the love really means can be best judged by a person who was in pure love at this world and has faced the failure.

It is my feeling, otherwise inclination to love with ALLAH is created in hearts only and only if blessed by Allah.

May Allah bless us all with his love, and eliminate the preference of love of materialistic attractions over his love, from our hearts.

Best regards,

Kamran.

Cool Lioness · 07-18-2007, 06:06 PM

<blockquote id="quote">quote<hr height="1" noshade id="quote">Originally posted by kamranACA
 Dears,

Once I read the phliosphy of some unknown SAINT; he never accepted any one as his follower (MUREED) without asking him a question. Have you ever been in love? Whenever the reply was in No; the person was not taken into BAIT. The philosphy behind was, the saint was of the view that whoever does not have an experience of love and specially of its failure in this materialistic world, cannot understand the basic requirements of being in REAL LOVE with God.

The deprived feelings, broken hearts, tears in eyes, soft emotions and distrust on materialistic attractions is the come out of real love, if any one had ever been in its exposure. These things help out a person to get into the love of ultimate lover (God).

Of course some of the Saints did not like it at all but even they had been in love in some part of their lives. Hazrat Ali Hajveri (known as Daataa Ganj Bakhsh) Rehmutullah Aleh has written in his book "KASHF-UL-MAHJOOB" that he had been in love with some beautiful girl for one year in his life time and he declared this one year's period as the worst period of his life becoz such materialistic love abstained him to some extent from YAAD-E-ELLAHI.

In my view the real love is the love with ALLAH.

However, what the love really means can be best judged by a person who was in pure love at this world and has faced the failure.

It is my feeling, otherwise inclination to love with ALLAH is created in hearts only and only if blessed by Allah.

May Allah bless us all with his love, and eliminate the preference of love of materialistic attractions over his love, from our hearts.

Best regards,

Kamran.
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I agree the Love with your Creator is the actual or in other words real love. But sometimes i dont understand that Is the Love with a person in world, other than your parents, bros and sisters etc, sin? If it is then why this emotion is created in our heart at first place? I mean its something so natural that sometimes you really feel extreme attraction towards a person. I will clarify here that lust is not love. There is a huge difference between both words and feelings behind them. The love for time passing is also ofcourse wrong.

Secondly what about the love between husband and wife? That is also a wordly love.

If i talk about my case, I always tried to offer my duties towards Allah. But side by side i had the love for that person( which is no more now) too.

Astute Accountant · 07-18-2007, 11:26 PM

@ Cool Lioness
By special friend do u mean 2 say a friend of opposite sex?
If not, I've many special friends. We had a group of 7 friends when I was @ college. We all r still in contact n' have gr8 fun when we talk 2 each other.
Besides, I've other good n' really loving friends, too which became my friends after I left my college. will tell u more after a cuople of days coz I've 2 go somewhere now.OK?

Cool Lioness · 07-19-2007, 05:23 PM

<blockquote id="quote">quote<hr height="1" noshade id="quote">Originally posted by Astute Accountant
 @ Cool Lioness
By special friend do u mean 2 say a friend of opposite sex?
If not, I've many special friends. We had a group of 7 friends when I was @ college. We all r still in contact n' have gr8 fun when we talk 2 each other.
Besides, I've other good n' really loving friends, too which became my friends after I left my college. will tell u more after a cuople of days coz I've 2 go somewhere now.OK?
<hr height="1" noshade id="quote"></blockquote id="quote">

Bholay shehzaday by Special Friend i meant someone you love. Friend tou sab ke hotay hain, same sex se hon or opposite se. We were a group of 6 people in college and we all are still in contact too.

kamranACA · 07-19-2007, 06:45 PM

Dear Coollioness,

In my earlier post I did not deny that the love with a human who is not ur sibling is something out of the world or out of the perception. It is also not a taboo. God admits the existence of such attraction in the Holy Quran.

However, the moral restrictions are always there specially for the muslims, as per laid down boundries of character maintenance. This of course is kept in view by every one who has a fear of Allah.

Humanly love is a reality and is made for us by God. Love between husband and wife makes the home a place to live at and it plays a crucial role in the development of wisdom and character in their generation.

I personally cannot and as such do not deny form the reality of this attraction which has been created in the human hearts by the nature. I also agree that sometimes it has nothing to do with the physical desires but here I must mention that the humanly love is ULTIMATELY focussed on having a close relationship (although always expected to be within legal and islamic framework) and physical desire is to some extent embeded in the wish to get some one's company for the life time. However, the sincereity for a longer-term (for life time) relationship is always the attribute of a pure humanly love.

This is the nature of a human to like beautiful, attractive and well appeared things. Likewise, a human wishes to have best for his/her company. No one wants or at least predict or wish an ugly personality when dreaming the future life. This all has a great connection with the physical desires and one cannot totally rule out this fact.

Whenever God blesses some one the blessing appears to be unlimited and unrestricted and is also not limited to any specific religion or sect. When God gives someone wisdom, he makes the people like Ein Stien, AbdulSalam, Newton and Arstotic. Whenever he gives the power he makes, Alexender the great, Farooq the great (Raziallah Ta'ala), Changaiz Khan, Saairus and Babur. Whenever God blesses beauty he creates person like Yousaf (Aleh-e-salam).

These all things are blessed by God and could be called the merits of some one's personality. Humanly love is always influenced from one of the above merits. I dont much know about the females' psychology but males are mostly influenced with the beauty, family background and level of education. Still, in number of cases, beauty comes first.

We can claim that love is always an attraction having no connection whatsoever with physical desire. I can agree to it to a little extent. But what the disguised reality is? I feel there always remains some specific feature which creates the attraction and ultimately it has something to do with materiality and physical relationships. This is an unknown fact.

You may have some different opinion.

Regards,

Kamran.

Imran · 07-19-2007, 08:26 PM

Dear Kamran

First of all as you said
We can claim that love is always an attraction having no connection whatsoever with physical desire. I can agree to it to a little extent. But what the disguised reality is? I feel there always remains some specific feature which creates the attraction and ultimately it has something to do with materiality and physical relationships. This is an unknown fact.

I dont think so that physical relationship is must for affection to any one. Perhaps the feelings that we experience when we are in love represent a normal state. Being in love shows a person who he should be.Love is something which does not have measures. But when there comes materialy it means that love is un sincere. Clarity of minds is very much essential for love. Clarity of mind means clarity of passion, too; this is why a great and clear mind loves ardently and sees distinctly what it loves.

Also i have seen that there exist always a bad opinion about the internet affairs. It is not true in every case. Though i dont want to discuss it but let me tell those who have such opinions that my love story is founded by an internet chat and now she is my wife and i love her so much that i dont think any one in this world might have such affection for his/her life partner as i have. Before marriage we chated for one year.

Cool Lioness · 07-19-2007, 09:05 PM

Yes i am highly in favor of moral restrictions in such affairs. These restrictions only makes your relationship stronger. Also it helps you alot in understanding each other. If you get yourself indulged in physical attractions and desires only, i can bet you dont get the chance to think about other aspects of this affair, consequences of such relation and above all you fail to understand your partner fully. Physical attraction is like a blind fold on your eyes. Once you get married, within few months you start feeling that this person is not the same guy you knew before marriage. And same the other party (your partner) thinks about you. Actually both are same but after marriage, now when their all physical desires are so easily approchable, they are least bothered about it. As a result the blind fold starts getting off from your eyes and you start looking around yourself more clearly. Then you realize that may be you have made a mistake by selecting a wrong person. But as they say, It is useless to cry over spilt milk.

So my advice to every one here, and who so ever read this is kindly do not ever go for physical relationship in your love affair. Rather try to understand the person before you make him/her your life partner and not jump into staisfying those wishes which will come true anyway once you get married.
The same attitude is expected from us by our religion also, which is ofcourse for our good.

One thing i will clarify here that physical relationship doesnt mean only the extreme stage but all those activities, where your body, is physically involved and that can provok the devil inside you. That includes taking hand in hands, sitting very closely side by side etc etc. ( i think i should not go in much details since every one here is much mature.)[)]

Cool Lioness · 07-19-2007, 09:26 PM

Also i have seen that there exist always a bad opinion about the internet affairs. It is not true in every case. Though i dont want to discuss it but let me tell those who have such opinions that my love story is founded by an internet chat and now she is my wife and i love her so much that i dont think any one in this world might have such affection for his/her life partner as i have. Before marriage we chated for one year.

[/quote]

Mr. Imran you are really lucky if you were able to find a wife of your dreams thru internet. But the thing that i want to say is that One should not believe on them blindly as i did. I will say it was may be my foolishness, may be my innocence, or may be the whole situation which was created, that first of all the guy got my sympathies for him which later on, dont know how changed in to fondness and affection. Anyway i will not go into the details, but atleast i am not going to believe anyone on internet now untill i have full knowledge and proof of his existance.